“Your words were found and I ate them, and your words became to me a joy and the delight of my heart”(Jer. 15,16 RSV).
Every time I try to tell the story of how I came to enter the seminary and travel to road to the diaconate and priesthood, I often think of it differently and give a different story. I think this because there was no ‘straw that broke the camel’s back’ in making this decision – it was a lifelong realization.
I come from a family that was not originally Catholic. My parents were both baptized, but not practicing Catholics. When my brothers and sisters were all either approaching or in school, my parents decided they wanted for us a private education, not an education at a public school. Originally there was a waiting list at Sacred Heart and my parents flirted with the idea of sending us to a Baptist grade school, but by the grace of God we were bumped up on the waiting list. With my older brother in the first grade and me going into kindergarten, my parents sent us to Sacred Heart.
It was here that I encountered the Catholic faith for the first time. Through religion classes, prayer, school mass, the sacraments, general proximity to the church and the general environment – it all made an impact on me.
It was through school that I was introduced to the sacraments and made my ‘First’ sacraments. I was also introduced to mass. I don’t remember what of it interested me or what I really understood of it; all I knew was that I wanted to go to it! I would ask my parents if we could go to mass each weekend, an excitement I felt about the prospect of going to mass. Looking back it is these emotions and feelings that I remember most about my earliest days with my Catholic faith.
I got involved in altar serving in the 5th grade and I remember May 3, 1997 as my first time serving mass – that date is seared into my mind. I loved serving mass and I remember that I felt an ‘awe’ each time I served. I served all the way through the eleventh grade. At that time, I became a Eucharistic minister in my parish.
Boy Scouts was another formative experience for me. I joined them also in the 5th grade and stayed with them till I turned 18 and since then I have offered my help and assistance in any way I can. The scouts really defined me for many years of my life. My brothers and some of our friends were in it and we spent a lot of time with them and doing any number of activities or outings. If you were ever in scouts, you know of all the projects and activities you can get involved in and how time consuming it can be. I completed all the religious awards, led by very faithful men, and those furthered my exposure to the faith and the various aspects of it.
For high school, I decided that I wanted to continue my Catholic education so I decided to attend Villa Maria Academy, the school my older brother was already at, and I loved it. My brother and I were both on the maintenance staff at the school to help pay our tuition. This was a great blessing because not only did it teach me the value of hard work and how the art of maintenance, but it allowed me to become part of the school that other students were not. Working there after school till evening, some days well past dark, and all summer fort eh whole of the high school years, I got to know and interact with the faculty in ways that I would never have if I was just another student. There were phenomenal teachers and dedicated staff at the school and I got to know them personally, often times becoming friends with them and being able to joke and have fun with them. This whole expereicne made me feel that I belonged there; it made me feel that I was an integral part of this school and its Catholic identity and mission. The education was wonderful and I learned well from amazing teachers who cared about me and really wanted me to succeed and be something.
It was in this time of high school that I seriously began thinking about the priesthood. When I was young, I admired my pastor, Fr. Findley. To me, he was half a step below God. Fr. Findley was a man of few words, but when he spoke, you didn’t want to miss any syllable. He was gentle, prayerful, peaceful, dedicated to his people and did a lot to help others out. I wanted to be like him. I wanted to be as holy and providing as he was. He was the image of Christ and the faith that I had and I wanted to be like that. I knew the effect it had on me and I wanted others to experience that too.
In high school the vocation director came my freshman year and spoke to the guys about the priesthood. It was in one sense liberating because I never knew or understood where priests come from and it left me with a sense of wonderment and peace because he addressed my desire to be like Fr. Findley. It was all through high school that I met with the vocation director and pried every answer and word of advice and guidance that I could out of him. I felt a desire to be a priest, but it was a scary step. It was my senior year, Christmas break, and the vocation director called me and explained how it is now Christmas of your senior year and if you are going to enter seminary next year, you need to start the application process and get the ball rolling. He needed an answer right there and I blurted a somewhat insecure ‘Yes’!
This is a rather crude thumbnail sketch of how I came to enter the seminary. As I said before, there was no epiphany that sealed the deal or revealed the possibility of seminary to me, it was just factors in my life that added up in such a way that allowed me to see that God was asking me to enter seminary in the Fall of 2004. It was a combination of life and a personal prayer life that I was able to cultivate in the midst of a rather chaotic life. I found that God was the source of love, healing, comfort, peace and forgiveness that we need as human beings. I became very close to God and intimately knew Him as He intimately knew me. This knowledge of one another was the fuel that kept the faith alive and burning in my heart and that added the needed layer of meaning to life. I saw that nothing, good or bad, has any meaning void of a relationship with God. I came to know this and covet it. School, scouts, work, family and everything else is incomplete without God as center of it all. This is what I learned and this is what I desire to pass on and share with others.
I am approaching my final year of seminary here in the Fall of 2011 as a deacon. I am amazed that I have come so far and have experienced and achieved the things that I have. Truly God has blessed me and continues to bless and guide me along the path.
